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Things Matthew Barnaby Could Be Doing Instead Of Serving 500 Hours Of Community Service

On May 13, former Blackhawk and current ESPN talking face, Matthew Barnaby was arrested at his family home in Buffalo after an altercation with his wife. Today he exchanged the dropping of misdemeanor charges of criminal mischief and aggravated harassment for 500 hours of community service. 500 HOURS!

Following the jump are many other things Matthew Barnaby could be doing with those 500 hours.

  • Drive from Chicago to Tijuana, Mexico (for legal reasons) and back over 7.5 times.
  • Attend 111 4.5 hour Red Sox vs. Yankees games.
  • Watch all 45 episodes of Sports Night (including commercials) 22 times.
  • Swim the English Channel in record time 71 times.
  • 394 viewings of The Vagina Monologues starring Eve Ensler.
  • Sing the Beatles' version of "Happy Birthday" 900,000 times.
  • Attend 333 Las Vegas showings of Spamalot (they cut out a few songs and the intermission. Stupid Vegas.).
  • Watch this titillating and entertaining "Banana Phone" YouTube video 12,500 times.
  • View 187 sinkings of the real life RMS Titanic.
  • Question your life's decisions hourly, whilst in an orange reflector vest 500 times.

Barnaby has a year to complete the 500 hours or the charges stick. Good luck, Matthew.