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The New Jersey Devils Reach The Height Of Contract Absurdity

… or, maybe not; we’ll see, but New Jersey Devils left wing Ilya Kovalchuk has been offered a 17-year, $100 million deal to re-sign with the team.

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No, you are not reading those numbers incorrectly. 17 years. Seventeen. Kovalchuk will be 28 around the time the next NHL regular season ends, so he will be 45 when the deal expires.

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Will there even be a National Hockey League in 2027? Maybe that’s the point. The Devils are throwing out a contract this long because they don’t have any idea what will exist 17 years from now.

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17 years. Parents of newborn babies reading about this today will be parents of teenagers about to graduate high school when this proposed deal ends.

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Happy 2027, Ilya. Wherever you’ll be. (And please. Don’t tell Jim Hendry about this contract.)