Derrick Rose Injury: The Five Stages of Grief

Derrick Rose's ACL tear will cause him to miss the remainder of the playoffs, the Olympics, and a chunk of next season. The Bulls' title aspirations, once so promising, are now shot. Bulls fans, we're going to get through this together. Following any catastrophic event, the grieving process is important. If you're like me, you're probably confused right now and that's understandable. For now, familiarize yourself with Elisabeth Kübler-Ross's Five Stages of Grief. Over the next few months, we're all going to be taken on a roller-coaster ride full of emotions. There's going to be good days and bad days and days when we want to swear off basketball completely. Keep pushing. Read Kyle Korver's Facebook message over-and-over like I did. After the jump, the Five Stages of Grief in relation to Derrick Rose's injury. You'll recognize many of the sentiments presented and hopefully use this as a guide to help understand your emotions. See Red.

DENIAL:

[Favorite expletive]

He's been injured all year. Just another blip.

A lot of knee injuries look more serious than they are.

He didn't walk off on his own power as a precautionary measure. He could have if he wanted to.

ANGER:

Why was he still in the game?!?! THIBS YOU MOTHER FUCKER!!!!!

Why is he trying to drive to the basket?!?! THE GAME IS OVER!!!!!

This wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for the CONDENSED SEASON!!!!!

I'm going to virtually kill the next person who LOLZ on Twitter.

[Spend the next hour on Twitter waiting for legitimate updates. Bombarded with speculative nonsense]

Minor Injury

Serious Injury

Season-Ending Injury

Career-Ending Injury

ACL

MCL

PCL

SAT

MRI

ACL

SMH

FML

[Start punching the table until knuckles bleed]

[Escorted out of bar]

BARGAINING:

Please God, take my ACL. I don't need it to work at Staples.

Hypothetically, if one were interested in donating an ACL, would that even be possible? If it were possible, who would one contact about setting up an appointment? I'm asking for a friend.

I'll buy season tickets next year.

I'll stop making fun of LeBron's male pattern baldness.

Name the charity and dollar amount.

DEPRESSION:

What's the point of watching the rest of the Playoffs? We're all going to die anyway.

[Watch Derrick Rose 2011 YouTube mix while eating ice cream with bare hand out of the carton]

Cry uncontrollably.

[Watch Derrick Rose MVP acceptance speech]

Cry some more.

Replay the first 46 and a half minutes of Game 1.

Ingest two of everything in the medicine cabinet.

Experience guilt. I didn't cry this much when my dog died. I didn't cry this much when my GRANDMA died.

ACCEPTANCE:

We can still beat Philly without him.

Boston is going to be tough - HOLY SHIT the Hawks just won! Rondo may be suspended for Game 2! We can beat Atlanta easy without him!

Consider a possible ECF rematch with the Heat.

[Favorite expletive]

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