Former Bulls Center Brad Miller Is Retiring -- Read Trey Kerby's Eulogy To His NBA Career

As someone who has been a fairly prolific (in output only) fake Internet sportswriter since before Deadspin had "jumps", I can say with conviction that one of the hardest things to do is writing something you know people are going to read, something that is expected to be extra good because of the subject matter at hand.

When the White Sox went to the World Series in 2005 and I was the only freshman sportswriter for the school newspaper at my small South Side college? Pretty sure I vomited on the keyboard of my parents' Gateway desktop, like, six times out of pure nerves. Same goes for when the Bears played the Packers in the NFC Championship two years ago, when the Bulls played the Heat in the Eastern Conference Finals, or, most recently, when the Bears traded for perennially misunderstood wide receiver Brandon Marshall. Writing (at least when you're not super, A+ good) can be tormenting enough when no one is reading. When something is, gah, expected of you? Yeah, that can be mega-difficult.

Yesterday, Brad Miller told Yahoo's Marc Spears he was retiring. The tweet was pretty great:

Yes, hunting shows. Because, duh, what else would Brad Miller do with his free time?

If you are the type of human who likes basketball, the Internet, and jokes, the first person you probably thought of upon reading this was Basketball Jones blogger Trey Kerby. If something like "Brad Miller's biggest fan" is a real thing, then that person is certainly Trey. With bated breath, the Internet waited on Trey's eulogy to the NBA career of the former Chicago Bulls center. It was published today, and we're happy to say he knocked it out of the park, like it was no biggie.

Says Trey:

"He’s just a dude. He doesn’t need a narrative."

Yes, that about sums it up so far as Brad Miller goes. So, go to TBJ and read the whole thing. There's a bunch of videos to go along with a lot of really good words. There's even a Cuonzo Martin shout-out in there for all of you East St. Louis High School basketball fans. Something for everyone, as they say, or at least people who like basketball, the Internet, jokes, and/or East St. Louis High School hoops.

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