So you had your entire weekend of August 7th planned around the Hall of Fame preseason game between the Chicago Bears and St. Louis Rams, only to find out there won't be any football that weekend.
We here at SBN Chicago understand your heartache. Therefore, we offer a few alternatives to help fill the gaping hole in your life where once a play date between professional ballplayers stood:
- It's still a busy weekend in Akron, OH, so don't cancel your travel plans yet. The World Golf Championship takes place there that weekend as well as the Pro Football Hall of Fame ceremony itself. Richard Dent fully expects your presence as he's writing you off as a dependent on his taxes if you come.
- Also, the Twins Days Festival in nearby Twinsburg draws nearly 3,000 sets of twins and almost that many vain attempts by local men to meet identical young women on their visit. They continue to host the best twins contests in North America, mostly because Delmon Young doesn't attend.
- Assuming you hadn't planned on visiting Akron that weekend (your loss), get to Lollapalooza. Hardcore NFL fans who feared missing Noah and the Whale or Dale Earnhardt Jr. Jr. can breathe a sigh of relief. Both of you.
- Not interested in the hustle and bustle of hanging with the youngsters? Why, get thee to Serb Fest! Come for the roast lamb and pig; stay for the strudel and crepes! (Honestly, this sounds pretty awesome. Don't you feel foolish for choosing to sit inside and watch football?)
- Something closer to home? Gather all the local children and offer to pay them nothing to run around in mid-summer heat in full pads for three-plus hours while you sell tickets to their parents. If you find any children willing to do this, they will inevitably grow up to be NFL offensive linemen.
- If you're in a more passive mood, check out the "House Hunters" marathon to see the Jacksonville Jaguars shop for new homes in Los Angeles and Las Vegas. Can you believe they're even considering a rustic home near the mixed-use TIF funds? Why doesn't anyone listen to the agent?
- Have you checked your calendar? It might be your turn to bail out Cedric Benson.
- Finally, if you're still irked about the lack of a televised football game and just want to stew in your own juices, pull up the NFC Championship game again. That ought to knock the taste right out of your mouth for another few weeks. afds