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May 15, 2012 - 5 Must Reads for Chicago Fans

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Tasty slices of Chicago sports from our editors

Dale Sveum and Bob Brenly Have Some (Crackpot) Theories on How to Fix the Cubs

Dale Sveum sits in his office seething. 7-6 loss to the division-leading Cardinals and he replays the missed opportunities in his mind. The room smells of cigarette smoke and microwaved taquitos - the typical smell of a man coming to grips with big-league mortality. Something is off. Sveum dons his favorite (and supposedly lucky, or so he thought) red hunting cap. He keeps the bottle of Wild Turkey within arms reach. He grabs the bottle and takes a long pull. Managing a last place ballclub is not for the faint of heart, especially if your decisions are contributing to the losses. The losses are piling up. His eating habits are shit, and to make matters worse, he missed his scheduled doctor's appointment for the second straight time.

Something is off and Dale Sveum aims to fix it. In what will surely qualify as one of his smarter decisions this year, Sveum summons the reporters to his office. The reporters file in, microphones in hand. Sveum clears his throat, takes another pull from the bottle and begins his declaration.

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Jabari Parker Deemed 'Best High School Basketball Player Since LeBron James' On Cover Of Sports Illustrated

Jabari Parker's name has been known around local basketball circles since the small forward emerged as a freshman starter for perennial Chicago high school hoops powerhouse Simeon Academy, a feat not even Derrick Rose could accomplish. Now, Parker is good enough to be named the 2012 Gatorade National Player of the Year as a junior. He's considered the best high school player in the country, a future No. 1 overall NBA draft pick and the best player to come out of our city since....well, Anthony Davis.

But still. Jabari Parker is one hell of a high school basketball player. He's almost qualifies a local legend after leading Simeon to three straight state championships; yep, one for every year he's been in school.

A whole bunch of people who aren't familiar with Parker are about to get acquainted. Parker is on the cover of this week's Sports Illustrated.

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This Is The Best Michael Jordan + Dennis Rodman Back Tattoo You'll See All Day

Being a Chicago Bulls fan is usually pretty great. I mean, it's better than being a Wizards fan or a Bucks fan or a Nuggets fan; it's also for sure way better than being a Cubs fan. But, so far as Chicago Bulls fandom is concerned, the last few weeks have been pretty miserable.

The Bulls headed into the 2012 NBA Playoffs with a sterling 50-16 record and homecourt advantage throughout. They also entered the postseason with Derrick Rose having two functioning knees and Joakim Noah having two functioning ankles. You know how that worked out. In the end, the Bulls became the fifth top seed ever to lose in the first round of the NBA playoffs. Sad times. Like, so far as sports fandom is concerned, this is truly the pits.


Related: O'Donnell: Luol Deng Will Play For Great Britain In The Olympics, And Deserves Chicago's Support

Everyone grieves in different ways, though recent studies show most people grieve with sad Facebook statuses. While that remains largely true, sometimes people grieve in more artful ways. Like by getting big-ass tattoos of Michael Jordan and Dennis Rodman scrolled across their back.

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USC Football Recruiting: Local Running Back Ty Isaac Chooses Trojans

The Chicago metropolitan area has produced a genuinely ridiculous amount of homegrown basketball talent over recent years, but the same can't be said for football. Steelers running back Rashard Mendenhall, former Bengals guard Eric Steinbach and Colts safety Tom Zbikowski each made it out of the 'burbs and to the NFL, but the Chicagoland area is far from a football factory. That's why Ty Isaac's commitment to the USC Trojans on Tuesday is so meaningful.

Isaac stars at Joliet Catholic, one of the state's perennial high school football powerhouses. For as dominant as the Hilltoppers usually are, they haven't produced a prospect as good as Isaac since former Tampa Bay Buccaneers fullback Mike Alstott. Isaac, a consensus top-10 national recruit, is that good.

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